Trying to be Gluten Free

I am gluten free.  Four of my coworkers are gluten free.  When a customer comes in needing help in this area, we are your girls.  We know how overwhelming and time consuming label reading can be, and the anxiety you feel about the possibility of “cross contamination.”

Now New Year’s is that special time of year when suddenly your gym is packed, when just a few weeks prior, I could exercise in peace.  Resolutions bring about fad diets, promises to exercise, blah blah blah.  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with making strides to better yourself, but Resolutions typically don’t live beyond January 6th.  New Year’s 2014 brought in a huge amount of customers “wanting to try the gluten free diet.”

Sigh.  Just fyi, being “gluten free” won’t help you lose weight – except at restaurants which provide free bread, on which you can’t binge.  Purchasing gluten free goodies (cookies, cupcakes, crackers, etc.) can actually make you gain weight because often times extra butter, sugar deliciousness is added to compensate for the lack of gluten.

Violet Beauregard

So there I am, pouring out my vast sans gluten knowledge, walking customers (women) around the store, helping them pick out all the various things they can eat.  They notice the amount of sugar and fat in various baked products and retort, “Please show us healthy gluten free food.  You know, no fats or oils.”  Sure!  No problem.  I help pick out a large selection of foods that I think taste great and fit the bill: quinoa salads, kale chips… you get the idea.  I turn to my faithful followers to see…

“You know what?  I’ll just take the creamy mozzarella pasta salad.”

Ughhh.  The END.

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